Why am I not homeschooling yet? I know, I know...I can't believe it either

We had a lovely unseasonably warm day this week and headed out to the zoo after school.  We enjoyed the mostly empty zoo at a leisurely pace.  And I thought, why am I not homeschooling?  I should pull him and homeschool.  I see more signs pointing to this fact practically every day.  Questionable things happening at school, more and deeper unhappiness at home in the evenings.  I miss my son, and we’re experiencing negative behavior due to that disconnection between us.

We spent quite a bit of time with the penguins that day.
We spent quite a bit of time with the penguins that day.

I’m still struggling with the decision

I know all the above positives and negatives.   And yet, I’m struggling to make the actual decision.  Why?  I’m still trying to figure that out.

Why am I struggling?

All of the reasons I laid out in this earlier post about why I sent him to kindergarten in the first place.  They all still hold true.  We are still figuring the whole school thing out.

My son has mixed feelings. scan0001-1_20161031103006857 I’m not letting my 6-year old make this decision alone.  But I am discussing it with him, because his input is important to me.  And he wavers, depending on the day, about whether he wants to continue or not.


We are having a really negative teacher experience.  You might think that would make me run even faster.  And it is definitely a push, as it is majorly contributing to the negative feelings surrounding school.   But she’s new and might improve.  And she is not the entirety of the school experience.  I hate to let her make us miss out on any positives he’s experiencing.  And I met with the principal just days ago.  He seems great, and really seems to understand the issues we’re having.  He has a plan to help.

We’ll see more if we stay longer.   My son is excited for the art show at the end of the year, where he’ll have one or more projects on display.  He’s experienced a school party, a school book fair, and a couple school fundraising events.  He hasn’t been on a field trip, or seen an assembly.  There are a lot of school things he’ll see just this year that he won’t experience if we pull him.  Overall, I think that’s not a huge deal.  But I do want him to experience some of these things to know they exist.

I worry both of us will have a hard time keeping up with friends we will no longer see every day.  My son and I both have friends that we see because he’s going to school.  We can try and keep up with them, but once schedules change and we no longer see them by default every day, that’s easier said than done.

And I’m overwhelmed…

It’s a hard decision and it feels more permanent that it really is.  I know that we can change what we’re doing and make any number of different choices, including public and private school, part-time school, or homeschool.  No choice is permanent.  But every change requires a lot of thought and effort, at least for me.

It’s hard to be different and go against the norm.  Ahh, the biggest reason.  It’s hard to know that this non-mainstream decision is the right way to go.  I don’t have any experience with homeschool outside of the past couple years researching it, and many acquaintances who are homeschooling.  It feels really overwhelming to opt out of the choice that everyone else is choosing.

The Silver Lining

All that said, I’m fairly certain we’ve already decided we’ll homeschool next year.  Full-day school (as opposed to this year’s half days) is just not something I want for my family at this time.  Knowing that, I feel more comfortable with my current indecisiveness.  If things get worse at school, we’ll pull him.  But for now, we’re floating along a little further on the cloud of indecision.

40 thoughts on “Why am I not homeschooling yet? I know, I know...I can't believe it either

  1. It’s a hard decision but I am sure you will make the right one for you and your family. Last year my son had a difficult time at school. It was not teacher related but the overall running of the school. This year he as a new teacher and principal and he seems a lot better.

  2. Home schooling isn’t for everyone. I personally couldn’t do it, but i have a friend who is absolutely loving home schooling and it suits them.
    I work, so it isn’t an option.

    1. My husband and I work opposite schedules as much as possible, so that’s how we will handle it. I’m in a state-wide group of home schoolers in my state, and the are many that work full-time and still homeschool. It would definitely take even more juggling.

  3. Home schooling is a huge decision and commitment. But the rewards down the road to pay off. I wish you the best of luck in your deciding. You know your kid best and what works best for you guys. You got this!
    Mihaela Echols recently posted…Beauty UnseenMy Profile

    1. I understand feeling that way. My son is a wreck after school and requires way more patience in the after school and evening hours than he does usually, so that’s part of why I don’t feel the same.

  4. If you do decide to homeschool it will be difficult to keep up with the social life since it’s less interaction. But sounds like a tough decision to make, just do pros and cons and think whats best for your son. Good luck!

    1. Thanks! We’re lucky to live in a city with a large homeschool population and lots of programming for kids who are homeschooled. So we would have plenty to do even if he isn’t going to school.

  5. home school sounds great because you get to teach them in the way that you as a parent wants them to learn but I think being around peers is important for growth. You can’t get the same experience in a home setting as in a classroom setting where you are being challenged by a trained professional and interacting with other students. I think it is an important part of a person’s youth.

    1. We are lucky to be in an area with lots of homeschool opportunities, including classroom settings if we choose them for enrichment. So there will be plenty of opportunity for peer interaction, and interaction with mentors and teachers if we choose. Being challenged is something to think about. I haven’t decided my feelings about it yet. My parents told me my whole life that I was lucky to be in a class with so many bright students as it helped to push and challenge me. But it also provided huge amounts of negative competition and bad feelings. So I’m just not so sure. I was pretty driven regardless, and I’m not sure that’s what made the difference.

  6. I can relate so much to this. My son is only 4 months but I’m already in constant battle with myself to homeschool or not. Obviously, If i’m still working and unable to stay home then he will have to go to school but if we can get to place where I’m able to stay I really would like to homeschool. It can just seem so overwhelming though! And i still have 5 years before even making this decision! I firmly believe homeschooling is the best option but with that decision comes a lot of slack from family, friends, etc. And then that’s a lot of responsibility on my shoulders! Such a tough tough decision to make! But at the end of the day you know what’s best 🙂
    Amanda recently posted…25 Days of Gratitude ChallengeMy Profile

    1. You’re right about both the slack from others and the responsibility! I didn’t really start thinking about homeschool until my oldest was 3 or 4, so you’re way ahead of me in having time to weigh the options! Good luck!

  7. I’m hoping for the best! It’s good that you’ve decided instead of dealing with teachers that you don’t really see eye to eye with. I’ve never tried homeschooling and I admire parents who do.

  8. We had planned for our eldest son to start preschool this year however he is not having any of it. I even tried staying at the school with him. We are developing skills at home however we plan to try again next year. If it comes down to it I would homeschool if necessary as I have so many mixed feelings about today’s school system. I hope it all works out for you and your family.
    Bismah recently posted…Personalized Holiday Cards from Tiny PrintsMy Profile

    1. I understand. I was just saying to someone today that while I love our preschool and think they do a great job of teaching social and emotional skills through play, my kids would most benefit if it was for older kids. Like ages 4-7, intead of 2-5. I stayed in class all year with my daughter last year. There is actually a new private school in our area that’s running under a similar child-led, developmentally appropriate model. But it’s expensive, and I’m just not sure yet if it is the right route for our family. Good luck to you and your son!

  9. Both sides have advantages and disadvantages. Weigh the advantages more and go with it. It would be best for your kids either homeschool or big school.

  10. Homeschooling is a though decision to make.. But in some point, it helps our kids to be independent and responsible on their own..

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